Updated: Sep 11, 2022
We all experience a range of sensory input on a day to day basis. Typically our brains actually filter out a portion of our sensory experience on a daily basis, relegating it to the subconscious part of our brain - freeing up our big human brains for things like executive function, work, and managing our day to day obligations. I think it's also safe to say that many of us, in our day to day rush of life often actively filter out certain sensory experiences, in order to remain on task or even to keep ourselves safe.
So why include sensory play in your sexual relationships and sexual wellness practices?
The Five Basic Senses
We all know the 5 basic senses - sight, smell, sound, touch, and taste. There's certainly no need to include all 5 in a session, but I do recommend switching it up from time to time to make sure you fully explore them all!
Let's start solo!
I know I personally haven’t always taken the time to include sensory exploration in my own masturbatory practices, because let's face it, sometimes all you want to do is rub one out mindlessly and take a nap! That being said, without a mindful connection practice with yourself and your body - it can be easy to miss whole erogenous zones, and neglect the small touches that make your heart, soul and pussy (or cock) sing. If you’re a person who loves nice smells, and perhaps laments that you never get to go for a massage - set the stage! Some nicely scented candles, and a yummy body lotion are a simple way to start your own sensory explorations. Light those bitches up! (The candles I mean - please do not light humans or female dogs on fire). Dim the lights, and begin your own self massage with either a yummy oil or lotion you love. Personally I like to start with my feet, or hands - working my way up a leg, down an arm, missing not an inch of my own body. I’d like to be very clear that this is a VERY different experience than throwing on some moisturizer after a shower. This is a chance for you to slow down, and focus on the sensations your body, and brain are providing you. Experiment with pressures, strokes, there are even tools available for sensory exploration, such as; gua shua, shock vibrator, massage balls, etc. Take the time to smell the candles, enjoy the ambiance, and really savour the feeling of your own touch across the different regions of your body. If smell and touch don’t intrigue you - feel free to dive into the senses that do!
This is a wonderful time for you to connect to your own body and the wide variety of sensations available to you!!
Now we come to partner play!
Sensory play can spice up a cooling sex life, or alternatively just provide a new way for you to connect with and pleasure your partner. As always TALK about your plans for play and exploration together. Nothing good comes from non or miscommunication.
This is a chance to get spicy!
Playing with blindfolds - depriving yourself or partner of the sense of sight is an excellent way to increase the sensitivities to our other main senses. Restraints can be a fun addition to a blindfold but are definitely not necessary to begin sensory exploration together. Clear communication and trust is key in partnered play - but once you have those down pat the possibilities are endless!
Below are some possible options for each sense - feel free to mix & match to suit you and your partner's needs, wants, and desires.
Sight - blindfolds, closed eyes, dark rooms, etc
Smell - scented lotions, candles, baking, certain foods
Sound - music, each other's sensual noises, or lack of noise stimulation all together!
Touch - hands, feathers, silky fabrics, gear rotary roller, just about anything can be used in this category! Especially if your partner is blindfolded and/or has earplugs in - the anticipation and not knowing is often half the fun!
Taste - fruits, sweets, whipped cream - go wild with this one! You know your partner best so curate a selection of items for them to experience with their mouths while blindfolded or bound. You can feed them a single finger dipped in butterscotch and revel in the feeling of their tongue swirling around sucking your digit to get every last sweet molecule. Alternatively you can dip a dildo in whipped cream and watch them explore with their mouth. Both of these options have the fun dual ability to be incredibly sensual/sensory for them (taste/lack of sight etc), and you (sight, touch etc).
**Obligatory Safety Note
Please do not put food items, or the like in/on your partners pussy or asshole. PH balance is a very real thing and many food items can (and will) cause an imbalance resulting in a bacterial/yeast infection that will likely result in a doctor's visit.